Sesame Crusted Tuna with Sauteed Dou Miao

It's the Chinese New Year yet again. To the happy unmarried people who are blessed to be in a traditional Chinese family, like me, this is an occasion to get all excited about. All thanks to the ancestors who brought about the heritage that obliges wedded couples to give money to the jolly singles in exchange for their verbal blessings. Whether you think it's corny or not, it's tradition, and I'm loving it.

And when there's a festive season, there's always good food. My relatives are fantastic cooks and they make some of the best dishes the country has to offer(I'd like to think it's in the bloodline). Unfortunately, I got carried away and not a single dish photo was taken. Also, I don't have a habit of taking my camera with me wherever I go. I apologize. Because it is a great deal of information you're missing out.

With the nice amount of extra money received, I wasn't hesitant to spend it on something I really wanted to get for a long time. Fresh Tuna Steaks. It might seem like it's not much of a big deal, but it is for me because Tuna Steaks are rare in Singapore and cost a lot.

I don't know about you, but when dealing with food that's rare, expensive and flavorful, I'll try to keep it as simple as possible to accentuate it's natural taste. Initially, the plan was to turn the Tuna Steaks into Sashimi, but that is boring as hell so I did some homework and decided to adapt a recipe from the F word.

Glad I did that because it was sublime. I did not do the watercress salad because I had too much for the past few days and I can actually see them in my poop. Substituting it is a seasonal vegetable that is consumed during Chinese New Year, I don't know what it is exactly but I do know that it has nothing in relation to pea shoots. It has peppery tones with a nutty and bitter after taste. Which I think it's perfect for the dish.

Sesame Crusted Tuna with Sauteed Dou Miao
recipe adapted from the F word


Mise en Place
Serves 4

4 Tuna Steaks, patted dry with kitchen paper
7 Tbsp Soy Sauce
6 Tbsp Wasabi, mixed with a little hot water
60g Sesame Seeds(I used black because white was out, feel free to use either.)
EVOO
White Pepper
100g Dou Miao or Watercress
40g Alfafa Sprouts or Bean Sprouts
Fresh Coriander, chopped

Dressing:
1 Garlic Clove, peeled and crushed
1 tsp grated Ginger
1 Tbsp Soy Sauce
Juice of half a Lime
1 Tbsp Honey
3 Tbsp Sesame Oil

Baste Tuna Steaks with Soy Sauce, White Pepper and Wasabi. Coat with Sesame Seeds.

Mix all ingredients for dressing.

Sear Tuna Steaks 1 min a side with olive oil and allow to rest.

Get a pan really hot and add olive oil, cook Dou Miao for 15 secs and set aside.

Slice Tuna Steaks and serve them on a plate with sauteed Dou Miao and Alfafa Sprouts at the bottom. Drizzle with dressing and coriander.

Enjoy.

Plausible Threat

I think that people who call themselves vegetarians for the sake of stopping animal deaths or to abide 'kill no life forms' rules are a bunch of ludicrous and lifeless donkeys because of their sheer ignorance for mother nature and for their own well being.

These anti animal killing vegetarians believe that vegetables like carrots, cabbage and celery grows solely on sun, water and soil and therefore won't harm animals in the process. These idiots are wrong. Little did they know, hundreds or maybe thousands of lesser intelligent herbivores and/or omnivores like rabbits and bears are painfully dying everyday by being shot down or by getting caught in barbed wires and bled to death because they are hungry and desperately want to feed on vegetables in farms. And don't blame the farmers you dipshits, they are merely trying to earn a living by protecting their crops. Remember that the more vegetables they demand the more cute little animals will cruelly die.

I won't blame you if you think that was a pile of bullshit but imagine what will happen if the campaign of the vegetarians becomes successful and the governments of the entire world bought their bullshit and not eat meat? Will life be better? Will man and Bambi infatuate? Will there be a whole new meaning to 'Puppy Love'?

No. So put away the pipe. This is what will happen:

Everyone will die much earlier because they won't have enough red blood cells. New Zealand will perish because livestocks will be set free to eat a shitload of greens that vegetarians live on and produce immeasurable amounts of offspring to eat more greens. Animal porn industry will rise and so will the number of newly discovered STDs. Great chefs will commit suicide. People allergic to legumes, citrus, iodine and such will commit suicide. The world will be experiencing a perpetual famine because of the unnatural nature cycle. The world will end.

In other words, every voluntary vegetarian is potentially a terrorist. For the love of mother nature and mankind, dictate your vegetarian friends or family to eat meat like a human should, use force if you need to, it's only for a good cause.

Existing in this world is another group of people volunteering to vegetarianism because of 'kill no life form' beliefs. Kudos to them for their faith and determination, but I feel sad for them for suffering for nothing. Not because I'm distrusting their beliefs, but because there are things they don't know.

If any living thing is able to kill no life form in this world, I will cut off my bollocks with a blunt knife. By killing no life forms, you are actually telling me that you:

1. Never flush your toilet and you love the smell of abominable rancid decomposed turd because flushing them down will kill bacteria lives that are present.
2. Can exist in this world by not eating because everything we eat are life forms. In case you're wondering, plants are life forms too, they need sunlight, water, fertilizer and air to grow, yes?
3. Keep your ejaculation in an incubation storage.
4. Are already dead because breathing kills organisms in the air.

It is only natural and enjoyable for us to eat meat, so go forth and grab a burger now. The only vegetarians that are sane and I completely empathize are the people who love meat but cannot consume so because of some lethal allergies. Just for this group of unfortunate people, I hope you will like this really delicious vegetarian recipe.

Wild Mushrooms with Fresh Pasta

Mise en Place
serves 4

450g Fresh Pasta
400g Mixed Wild Mushrooms
1 medium Onion, chopped
3 cloves of Garlic, chopped
300ml White Wine
2 Tbsp Butter
3 sprigs Thyme
Juice of 1/2 a Lemon
EVOO
Italian Parlsey, chopped
Sea Salt
Black Pepper
Freshly Grated Parmesan


Saute onion, mushrooms and garlic in butter and EVOO.

Add thyme and white wine then reduce.

Cook pasta in boiling hot salted water until al dente. Drain.

Toss with mushroom mixture and add parsley, lemon juice, Parmesan and season.

Done.

Jook.

Since seven days ago, the existence of 'Jook' had given me the will to put up with the mother of all excruciating pain that is the aftermath of my adult tonsillectomy. 'Jook' is my new best friend because it is possibly the most nutritious and delicious thing to fit into my insane post-tonsillectomy diet. Everything that goes into my mouth has to be soften, liquified, be of a low temperature and must not be acidic. Otherwise, it will induce a throat pain intense enough to make me cry. Like when I had lemonade on Thursday because I thought I could use some vitamin C, then I started tearing literally and realized that the doctor's advice was actually making some sense. I couldn't be more stupid.

I cried and jumped from my seat on Friday when I took a sip of Whisky and that was the last time I ever had to go through such anal throbbing pain because it finally made me believe the doctor's advice.

Relying on 'Jook' has enlightened me and have me to realize the true facts in life like how Jesus hates us all. That is only if he existed with godly powers. I figured that if anyone had to go through this pain, they won't need Jesus, not at all, because he is not helping us with the slightest bit, but they will definitely need something else ungodly like 'Jook.' And for all the times when we are absolutely not in pain or need, he will come up to you and help you with imaginary ways and make you praise him.

For example, you just got your month's paycheck from your boss, then you step out of the office and something made you look down on the floor and you magically stumble upon a shinny penny and you look up the sky and whisper, 'Thank you, Jesus.' Or when you need to take a bus home and suddenly piles of vacant cabs drive towards the road beside the bus stop, you smile and say 'Jesus is my provider!'

Then when you'd actually need help like when you are experiencing sheer demonic throat pain from a tonsillectomy, you get thrown with some same old bullshit excuse that goes like: 'He works in ways you cannot see. He will make a way for you.' Being the good guy that I am, I have taken the liberty to meditate in that message and found out that it actually translates to a very special and meaningful message through godly vision. It says - 'Hallelujah Amen Jehovah Tonguespeaks! Manawakikichukapunkamukaarkapunga! Kuradamadedededada... Jesus is not around right now but please go to church and leave a message then donate because Jesus is lord. He created this thing called time and it heals everything. Jehovah Buhbye. Amen Hallelujah. Hakunamata!'

In case you're still wondering what 'Jook' is, it is the English pronunciation of the Cantonese word that means, Congee, which is a rice porridge often stewed with meat and preserved vegetables or herbs. I used the word 'Jook' because I think it's cool. If you don't like it or think it's stupid please get lost because I think Cantonese words are unique and chicks who speak Cantonese are sexy.

'Jook' has no acid, is all liquid, has lots of fiber to counter my constipation from my enormous Codeine intake but most importantly, it can be enjoyed lukewarm. Day one of post surgery I had 'Jook' with ginger and century egg, the preserved egg used in Fear Factor that I would gladly finish an entire basket of, I bought this from a stall because my anesthesia hasn't worn off and it was absolutely creamy and warm and delicious. Being a true Asian myself, I wasn't hesitant to have pork innard 'Jook' for another three days. I love pork liver especially because it melts in your mouth with luscious richness and flavor, think Foie with intense pig flavor. I had also pork belly, skin and intestines. I like belly and skin because of its gelatinous texture but intestines I would eat them once in a three months because sometimes they are all powdery inside and it makes me gag.

Then I made some myself. It was delicious - 'Jook' with Braised Spareribs and Liver, so post the recipe for everyone to try. Feel free to omit the liver if you are not a fan.

My Jook.


Mise en Place
serves 6

3 cups Short Grained Rice, rinsed and drained
100g Ginger, peeled and julienne half of it
5 sprigs Spring Onion, finely chop two
1 liter Chicken Stock, plus more
3 medium Conpoys
6 cloves Garlic, finely chopped
300g Spareribs
200g Pork Liver, thinly sliced
3 Tbsp Shaoxing Wine
3 Tbsp Dark Soy Sauce
3 Tbsp Soy Sauce
3 Tbsp Cornstarch
Sesame Oil
Peanut Oil
White Pepper
Sea Salt

Congee

Steam conpoy in water, 10g ginger and a sprig of spring onion for 20 mins, flake. Coat pot with a thin layer of oil. Boil rice in stock with half the whole ginger and conpoy. Simmer until soft and creamy. About an hour.

Braised Spareribs and Liver

Season rib and coat with cornstarch. Over high heat, brown rib and julienne ginger with peanut oil.

Color them nicely. Deglaze with Shaoxing wine and a little chicken stock. Low heat. Add both soy sauce, half of the garlic, white pepper and a touch of sesame oil. Simmer for an hour.

Cook liver in simmering sauce for 5 mins just before serving.

Garlic Oil

Lightly fry the rest of the garlic until golden brown.

To serve, ladle congee in a bowl and top with spareribs and liver. Drizzle sauce and sprinkle finely chopped spring onion and garlic oil.

Steak of Life

Hi, I'm back again. After two entire weeks I think, and I'm not going to give some bullshit reason for my absence to make you feel better about my less active blog. I have been lazy. Thats right. Loathe or love me, it doesn't matter.

My first start of the year had been rough. I'd been slapped with intense military exercise for most of the time. As of now, I have officially spent most of 2008 in the jungle or at the camp of overflowing testosterone. They were hard times. They were times when I could scream for a shower after days in a sweat soaked P.J-like cloth outfit, even if the shower is icy cold and if the water only drips at the complete push of a quick retracting button. They were the times when I am required to quietly hide from the enemy in a bush and unknowingly become man feast to the throngs of residing hungry forest mosquitoes and colorful biting spiders.

Most annoyingly, I had to live on bland and boring food from the military meal shack that went on the news for poisoning people. On a few occasions, I'd dream of proper food at night in the barracks and sometimes, I think about good food so much that I can't sleep. The food magazines and recipe books I used to bring to camp to maximize time, only made it worst. I swear they almost got disintegrated by the worst form of incineration that can ever be done to paper but now that I've come to my senses, I'm glad I didn't do it.

When I got home on Friday, good food was all that was needed for me to believe once again that life is actually good. The first thing that I wanted almost immediately at the point of leaving the camp was a bloody juicy and delicious piece of steak. I knew I couldn't get good steak anywhere around camp and I wouldn't pay for overpriced bullshit at the lame steakhouse near my house. I couldn't travel to fancy restaurants because I was weary and looked like shit. Right then I knew I had to get the meat from the market downstairs, cook it then let the stupid good-for-nothing domestic maid do the all the cleaning.

One thing I love about the Cold Storage Supermarket at the bottom of my condominium is that they constantly stock good beef. Not fantastic but good enough to close eyes and uplift cheeks. I got the Eye Fillet, one of the juiciest and most tender parts of beef, it costs a lot more but its worth every penny. I can afford it now thanks to FoodBuzz!

Now, here comes the recipe:

Eye Fillet of Beef with Garlic Mash, Green Beans and Chunky Red Wine Tomato Sauce

Mise en Place
serves 2

2 Large Potatoes, skinned and cut into chunks
6 Cloves of Garlic, peeled, finely chop 2 cloves
1/2 Stick of Butter
200ml Whole Milk
400g Roma Tomatoes, roughly chopped or use tinned
1 Red Onion, finely diced
3 Sprigs Rosemary
1/2 Cup Red Wine
3 Tbsp Balsamico
1 Big Handful of Green Beans, tips removed and washed
2 Eye Fillet of Beef
Sea Salt
Freshly Cracked Black Pepper
EVOO
Grape Seed Oil

Garlic Mash

Boil-Potatoes and whole garlic cloves in salted water until tender. Drain, mash with butter and season. Add milk and stir thoroughly.


Sauce

Saute-Garlic and Onions in EVOO on low heat until fragrant. Add tomatoes and rosemary. Bring to simmer. Add meat deglaze(see below) and simmer until chunky. Season.

Steak

Blast heat on stove and get a pan really hot. Season beef. Add grape seed oil to pan and sear beef at 1.5 min a side for rare, 2 for medium and 4 for well done. Allow beef to rest.

On the same pan, add wine(don't worry about the flames, just blow them out) and balsamico. Simmer until caramelized stuff at the bottom of pan is gone. This is the deglaze you add to your sauce.


Beans
Poach beans for 1 min in salted boiling water. Drain.

To serve, ladle sauce on plate and smear. Top with mash and beans on top. Lay beef. Enjoy.